#maybe I'm just autistic

[howlsmovinglibrary]

god i fucking love lecture writing. so much better than seminar teaching, where i have to get students to the answer on their own. no, let me just tell you the answer. professional-sized infodump of my Ultra Correct Opinions.

[eluxcastar]

Childe but now he's a little brother

── ୨୧：childe & reader

୨୧﹑synopsis :: childe was a troublemaker as a child, basically

୨୧﹑genre :: fluff

୨୧﹑content :: child childe, gn reader, use of childe's real name, mm family fluff and childe embarrassment served hot and fresh, reader is impled to be significantly older than childe

୨୧﹑words :: 724

generally all of my family/platonic works cover the other character being the more mature, role model-ish figure, but then I wondered about the reverse probably because I woke up with the worst stutter possible and here we are. childe isn't my first choice but something about hearing him say he wanted to team up against his siblings in a snowball fight made me think 'man what if he got punted into the sun with a snowball by his older sibling' and now we're here

all little siblingification posts

something about Ajax's tendency to behave stronger than he is is cute, always trying to be the best for his younger siblings like he doesn't have older siblings who do that for him. he is always running off to get into trouble but when he was younger the trouble was at least manageable enough that you could go get him. there are many times that though he does not call on you, he secretly feels safer having an older figure to hide behind when you come to his rescue in the face of whatever trouble he got into.

at his age, he can barely believe it when you somehow find him every time he gets himself in danger and have no problem getting all up in the face of whoever he pissed off enough to put him in danger. yes he gets a stern talking to and a smack on the head for putting himself there in the first place, but the way you would endanger yourself for him... it makes him hug you on the way home every time and often lies as he promises he won't do it again.

he thinks you're just the coolest thing sometimes, but Ajax also likes when you care for him in other ways, like when he comes to you with a book well past his bedtime and begs you to read 'just that one' to him before bed. you grab a blanket for both you and him to hide under and tell him the story he picked, a simple pleasure but he likes how warm it is when he snuggles up to your side and you wrap your arm around him. he likes when he falls asleep there, head resting on your chest where he tries to watch the pictures as the pages turn.

he gets tingles up his spine when you stroke his hair as he listens to your voice speak softly next to his ear, calming yet memorising him. it's easy to fall asleep there, hard to wake up wrapped up snug in a blanket but without you there anymore. he tends to drag himself out of bed with his blanket to see where you went and refrains from whining about it when he finds you tending to one of the younger ones at the request of your Mother. you always make room for him to curl up in your lap anyway and hand the baby off to someone else.

but that's not his favourite thing. his favourite thing and when you and your Father scoop him up and take him out to go ice fishing, carrying him along on your shoulders to the lake your Father must've picked up thick with ice that he tries to help you chisel out though he provides little in the way of help, as you tell him some story you had heard about and even gossip of your own Father's adventures knowing he finds them exciting.

he wants to hear about 'what you do all day anyway' as he waits for his fish, and you usually tell him some story he thinks is boring and asks to hear about something better but with little else to say you have to laugh it off and smother him in your lap in his puffy coat to keep him warm. until something bites and he excitedly hops up to get it like the cold doesn't bother him, like the ice isn't slippery and like he won't slip and fall on his butt like he always does.

something about your little trifles changes as he grows, and something about him becomes less and less like little Ajax, though you coddle him all the same. you always have, he feels so cold in your arms after going missing for three days, hugs you so tightly like you think he'll fall apart even though he says he's fine. he lets you carry him home and scrub him clean in a warm bath, fuss over him like you always do.

and again you will run to him to protect him when he runs off to start fights far worse than before.

but a little Ajax has to grow into a big Tartaglia someday, doesn't he? Tartaglia doesn't need to call for your help, though the moment he does, you will find him—wherever he ventures.

CROSSPOSTED ON AO3

[dongslinger--420]

Mixed feelings on Mr Peanutbutter and Pickles in general but honestly the best thing about their relationship is that when they go to see Angels In America neither of them bat an eye. I haven't watched the play nor have I watched Angels In The Outfield but I can safely say that if I were going to see such a serious drama expecting a comedy then I would at the very least be slightly distressed. These two go into it and come out the other end like "huh ok. That just happened" certified two weirdest people ever

[ficti0nalcharcter0bsessi0n]

I crave more knowledge than I can attain in one life.

[eddieshellscape]

i dislike izzy hands in the blorbo way.

Yes, I wanna kick him around like a cartoon character and throw him off a cliff.

But I also want to paint his nails and do his hair and call him a pretty princess, yk?

Also don't hate on people for liking/disliking character. People are allowed to have opinions sweaties.

[foremost-of-noble-ladies]

This just in: breadcrumbs on top of mac and cheese should be illegal.

[dogd0m-charlie]

i see a lot of posts about letting your autistic partner ramble about something while you touch them/give them head/fuck them/whatever, and i approve of that, definitely. 10/10.

but i would like to propose: autistic dom who infodumps to you while they're making you feel good and makes you pay attention to what they're saying the whole time. they're touching you in all the right places, going at just the right rhythm with just the right amount of pressure and it's driving you fucking crazy, all while they're rambling casually about whatever their current interest is like nothing's even happening.

every time you say something small to acknowledge what they're saying, like "mhm", "right", "yeah," or something like that, their movements get a little more intense as a reward for paying attention. but if you get lost in the pleasure and forget to engage with what they're telling you for too long, they go "sorry, are you not listening anymore? alright, i guess I'll stop then." and you have to beg for it if you want them to keep going.

[skrunksthatwunk]

non-comprehensive haruhi autism creature comp

i mean just look at him she's literally

[s-exy-sapphillean]

Just looked up the word "frown" because i wasn't sure about spelling for a moment and-

WHAT DO YOU MEAN FROWNING IS WHAT YOUR BROWS DO NOT WHAT YOUR MOUTH DOES???

why is this:

called a frown if it doesn't even have eyebrows

Bruh this is why my autistic ass struggles so much with facial expressions, wtf do u mean it's eyebrows that show frowning

I practically never emote with my eyebrows unless i'm doing something deliberately like raising them or scrunching my nose, how was i supposed to know other people do that and what it means

[ohara-n-brown]

Am I the only one that feels like NTs HATE saying 'I don't know.'

You will not believe the amount of times I'll ask a basic objective question about a situation and they'll give me an answer, only for later the answer to be completely wrong. And then when I ask them why they would give me wrong information - they say 'I just guessed.'

I didn't ask you for your guess. I asked for the information. If you didn't have the information don't just GUESS. Say 'I don't know.'

I feel like NT don't realize that WRONG information is worse than no information.

If I want to know when an event will end and you say '5pm' - I'm going to be mentally prepared for 5pm. And if it DOESN'T end then, not only will I be out of energy, but I'll be irritated and confused because I'm in an unfamiliar situation with NO INFORMATION

Had you just told me 'I don't know what time it ends' instead of GUESSING 5, then I would've prepared for the worse. But now I have to literally rearrange everything in my head and talk myself down from meltdown cause I was given inaccurate information and also I thought I was going home.

But they act instead like saying I don't know is a moral failure.

My father used to yell at me all the time to not say 'I don't know.'

He'd always demand I figure it out and come up with SOMETHING no matter how uninformed or vague and that's how you have NTs walking around feeling like it's a crime to admit they simply don't know something

and instead they'll just shamble something together and hope that's good enough regardless of whether in the information is actually helpful or correct.

IT'S SO ANNOYING. JUST SAY YOU DON'T KNOW.

Stop guessing and giving me WRONG information because it only makes the situation worse and more confusing. Say you don't KNOW. It's FINE.

[snoopy0706]

Most people probably didn't notice how intimate Charles reaction to Edwins Confession was.

Edwin has this type of edwardian pyjama/underwear kinda thing going on. The wide boatneck opening. But there is fabric on the shoulders.

Charles puts his hands on his shoulders. Saying all those very reassuring things.

(going to hell for him is btw the most romantic thing)

he slides his hands down his shoulders

and the decides to slide them up even further. touching Edwins collar bones. a very sensitive spot. It's lovely. and very intimate in a way.

[lafamilledelioncourt]

them: he manipulated them, killed their daughter, and fucked their heads. he's the villain! he's a sick twisted villain!

me: the 500+ year old vampire? with severe trauma? and zero support for his very obvious neurodivergence? the child sex slave? the dogmatically groomed prized possession? the cult victim? the 'has to figure out how to please people and blend in to survive and avoid further abuse' character? the 'regimented and desperate for order and sense of purpose so yeah he tries to do the job he is forced into to the letter' coven leader? the 'frequently abandoned, misused, and neglected so clearly he's developed frantic control issues to not lose his only sense of stability and comfort' one?

next day edit: hold on, i'm not done. i'm sitting here at lunch the next day and i really can not shake that some people do not get the point.

it's not that i'm gonna excuse villainous behavior. the tiny gremlin did all that shit, and his ass is gonna go in time out, but TO ME, the whole fucking point of the show is that no one is really the villain.

that's because they are ALL FUCKING AWFUL. all differently bad, all differently broken. the closest thing to a saint we got is madeline, so sure go off calling her the only good one im in agreement, but they are ALL A GODDAMN NIGHTMARE.

the beauty of this entire series, particularly the books for me but i do love the show, is that the nuance and wiggle room between monstrosities and man is the poetry of the story. it is beautiful that these creatures have this tiny gasps of heart and happiness and hope despite who and what they are.

i can scream into the void all week about armand and claudia and daniel bc those are the characters i most identify with bc of my own personal trauma. HOWEVER, that does not take away my ability to see that EVERYONE needs therapy.

put their asses on a vampiric SSRI, tell them to all fuck eachother and get the orgy over with, and then have an honest to god conversation about their feelings.

DAMN.

okay anyway, going back to work.

[amynable]

Maybe it's just a reflection of my own limited experiences and insecurities as a 2nd year transwoman but even the most kind and seemingly loving support of transwomen from cis women, especially cishet women, often feels like it actually starts and ends at "you don't deserve to be hated."

Yeah but I deserve to be invited into women's spaces? Do I deserve to be treated as an equal? Do I deserve to be loved even when I sound like a guy? Do you actually see me as a woman or do you see me as some outside-the-binary intersection of gay man and vulnerable victim with she/her pronouns?

Am I actually accepted or am I a victim of oppression that you ideologically believe should be defended, but would otherwise prefer not to think too much about? And does your support only last so long as I maintain a distinctly lower place in the social hierarchy than you, always monitoring my words and behavior so I don't misstep on the grounds of womanhood that I've only been given tentative, honorary permission to walk on?

It feels like you're saying "transwomen are women" while internally cataloging us in a group that's not man but distinctly not woman either, and that category is below men AND women in the patriarchal mindset that you never dismantled, just reorganized.

[lunarharp]

uhh another modern au agott follow-up. They've gotten progressively sillier

[boviform]

Okay, sorry but is anyone else going insane over the new longform on the latest Patreon livestream?? I absolutely love the dynamic of weird mortician and lonely assassin - literally 'me and the bad bitch I pulled by being autistic'. And the whole confrontation at the end!! I mean, can you imagine what could've been if Pyotr had agreed to give up his ways?? They could have been so happy! I want them to go on holiday around Europe and hold hands!!

[artist-issues]

I don't understand the hype around "neurodivergence." I don't get it. I don't get what you guys are talking about. What do you mean when you say "neurodivergent?" Do you just mean "thinks differently than everyone else?" Okay, well, everyone thinks differently than everyone else. We're all unique; nobody's interior world is exactly the same as everyone else's. So what is neurodivergence?

Some people talk about it like it's meant specifically to refer to people who are on the "autism spectrum" but that's not how I'm seeing y'all use it. Online, people say "autistic" and "neurodivergent" in sentences and contexts where the word "creative" or "artistic" or simply "unique-personality" would work better as descriptive words.

And what's a little more perplexing is the...romanticization of it. I just made a post about Mulan, the character, talking about how well-done her character trait of "creativity" is, and someone reblogged it and said she was "neurodivergent." When the whole point of the post is that she was creative: she solves problems with her own unique spin. That doesn't mean other characters in that movie don't also have a unique spin--Mushu ties tomatoes to her arrows to cheat at training. Is he "neurodivergent" too, or just creative? Why do you say "neurodivergent" when you mean "creative?"

What's going on here? Explain it to me, if you're more knowledgeable than I am and I'm just ignorant. Because really, I'd be glad to hear that it's not just one more case of our internet-drunk society creating an exclusive sub-culture with no reasonably defined traits to idealize and identify with.